Rajin: Definisi 'rajin' adalah dengan ringkasnya suka berkerja, bersungguh-sungguh berkerja. Manakala erti sebenarnya adalah melakukan sesuatu dengan senang. Jadinya perkataan rajin ini adalah satu perkataan yang saya dengan senang boleh katakan bahawa ianya tidak ada dalam kamus diri saya. Mungkin ada tetapi semestinya bukanlah dalam perkara-perkara yang memberi manfaat untuk diri saya seperti bersenam, makan, tidur dan tengok televisyen.

I want to be rajin. Straight up. Who doesn't right? Well, I wish I'm rajin in a sense that can benefit myself and my family. Like making money, making yummy food that you can sell, selling stuff and making success after success that is not just beneficial to just me alone. Sleeping, eating and exercising only helps me; and can that really make me happy? I admit I do try to be rajin as I can be but I gotta say, it is soooo hard. I mean, I am a lazybum at heart. I acknowledge that. So I'm basically trying to get there at the slowest pace possible but I'm not giving up. I refuse to.

So this past year taught me stuff so far. The fact I was jobless for these past 7 months made me wonder what would happen when I don't have my house, my car and my family to support me?

I thought of getting husband. A rich one at that. It'll be easy right? He has money and he'll support me and also attend to my every needs. Then I'd just have to take care for the kids and just live my life. Right? But then I thought what would happen if that husband leaves me and the kids? What would happen then?

Then I thought, 'Bah belajar saja.' Which is what I am doing right now, something that I've decided when I was way younger. That I'd like to get a degree, work comfortably in a high position with a high salary and just live like that. So easy right? Just study study study. But then I thought, okay you get your degree, you get your job and you are up there. What happens when you fall down? All this time all you did was study hard and get the job based on your qualifications without any experience of the job whatsoever. What happens then? Have you thought about anything as backup? I realised even my best idea has its obstacle now.

So then I tried looked the people around me. Inda payah jauh-jauh, I looked at my parents. My dad works hard in his job and he is just good at what he does. I mean, he's the one people search for to finish jobs as complicated as it gets. But other than his job, he thinks outside the box. I realise he always talks about business stuff with me. Be it something he'd like to try or others' business. When he wants something he works for it and even if it takes 3-7 years to achieve it, it will be in his arms. Alhamdulillah. Other than that he always tells me when he was younger; how hard his life was and that made him want to live a better life and provide for us. His aim was simply that and thanks to that aim, I have a life that I am just thankful for. He taught me to think about futures; whether we'll live to see that day or not. Just think about it.

My mum on the other hand, sadly to say works hard but is in an environment where favourite people are put in front first compared to the ones who work. So it aches me to see my mum when she comes home all tired and just getting nowhere. But here's where I am astonished by her. She bakes Eid cakes and those earning gets our Eid clothes; she thinks of all the things she can sell to people to just get the money and just doesn't give up even if it gets tiring. She taught me to just never give up and just be prepared for disappointments; and those combined observations made me think.

It made me think that, don't depend on anyone or anything. You can and you should because you can never do things on your own but always prepare backups. Always explore and always try your capabilities. Think of the future. Just because you're comfortable now it doesn't mean it will be the same forever. In a moment it can change and when it changes what happens then? Are you prepared for it?

That's why my only solution for now is to just be rajin. Just get use to being rajin; rajin to think, rajin to work, rajin to solve.

Toodles, 

HEE..HI!

I know..It's been a long time yes? HEE..Sorry..Again, I've been busy with the outside world. Here's what I've been up to!

Since it's Ramadhan this time, I've decided to go and 'begerai' (term I use when I say I rent a space to sell) and sell my pies and Fiqah's pasties. Alhamdulillah they are selling; some days are like hot cakes (sold out) some days not so much but no worries! That is what you call in Brunei adat nasib right? So I'm cool. Hehe I just try harder the next day! From when I wake up until sungkai; I am busy making these food. I don't even have the time to play in the day. So busy.

In other words I'm starting to go on a business venture right now. Other than food I'm selling tudongs (scarves) and other knick knacks as well. I don't know why I'm suddenly starting them now but I'm just so so grateful to be given the chance in my life to venture on this, Thank you Allah. Hehe.

Which led me to go to Hong Kong one more time! Hee! And Shenzhen also Guangzhou lah ah. Went there to buy my potential stock to sell here in my home. It was fun and an experience that's hard to forget and I already miss travelling! Haha..Baru jua 4 hari lapas dari sana. Hmm baiklah. Haha! 

And Alhamdulillah juga the Uni results are out and I got accepted to UBD! I'm so happy and tomorrow is the time to give back the reply letter + briefing. I'll get to that next time aight? Hehe..

I also would like to congratulate my Sayang, M for finally getting an Instagram account! So happy for him and it makes me more semangat to go into Instagram now.. Banar. Hehe..

I also basically went on a craving spree today. I went for sushi, I ate ambuyat, I had my Coffee Bean dose and I also ate my chocolates like they're kacang or something. M accompanied me in my eating venture and again, Alhamdulillah I am perfectly fed and satisfied. I couldn't be thankful enough!

I'll update more soon InsyaAllah..Toodles! 

Hahah au I'll do it in one post ok? I get it I get it..This trip is too outdated. I really need to update myself on this blog. So! Here goes!

Day 3

 As I mentioned our place is quite far from our eating place so we ended up just drinking for breakfast that morning. I really wanted to buy the bread banarnya because, I mean, atleast bread is something I won't have to query about. Ganya sadly there were pork sandwiches next to it so..Inda tah jadi..Lala..Minum saja..Hahah..So before we went to Tsim Tsa Shui we shopped around the Century Mall. Mum bought her sport shoes before we go any further and her hurt her legs again and seriously sport shoes sana atu ah -_- The one she bought was not even on sale tapi murah udah -_- Aishh. 

 So after buying mum's shoes, we went to Tsim Tsa Shui AGAIN. Mmmph. hehe to have lunch pulang ah so ok lah. Ganya mum's addicted to M&S so lapas makan, mesti singgah kat M&S and beli-beli. So batah tah lagi sana. Hahah..I didn't buy any from that store though. Because I think it's just too expensive for unemployed me so I just hung out and helped mum buy her baju there. Afterwards we went to this mall called Langham Place!

 Okay what I know about Langham Place is that it's the suppose venue for the Running Man's final game but they cancelled it because 5 thousand people filled up the place making it impossible for the Running Man members to run about. I gotta say I now understand why the producer picked that place. It's soooo pretty! So besar and so many kedai! The design of the building is more to art-sy fart-sy kinda thing lah ah and well, I have to say the main attractions are the escalator. It's soo high and so far! Gila wah! Took us around 2 minutes to get from one end to the top!

 Basically mama karau masa kami naik atu. HAHA. I was so focused on the top that I didn't even realised that it was really high up! When I looked down, aku pun ikut karau!

Day 4

 The next day we went around Heritage Mall. The mall was basically an old police station full of historylah ah and they revived the place and made it a shopping mall. The kedai here are so awesome! Kalah yang the ones arah Century Mall Mongkok and Nathan Road. I kinda wish we went here first before anywhere cause the stuff here are so lawa-lawa. I could die! Hahah. Yes for our 4th day we just relaxed and jalan-jalan saja..Took pictures and such..Hehe

 Okay funny story about Ladies' Market: So this market is quite near our hotel. Well, seriously close lah ah. You may have seen this market from the reality show: Giulianna and Bill when Giulianna was busy trying to look for a brand's bag for her friend. Remember? Ah yes ia udah tu. So anyways, for the past days we were in Hong Kong, we always went around this 1 market and thought this whole time that that was the Ladies' Market. So dull, not what we expected. But my mum, insisted that that market was not the Ladies' Market so we both (yes on our own) went out on our own to find the damn market. Hahah we really looked for and wide and FINALLY FOUND IT! ON OUR LAST DAY LAGI TU! HAHAH! So the market turns out to be of our expectations. And more! Seriously so panjang..Like a km's length? Sakit jua kaki dijalani lah ah. So many kedai and more pleasant then Shenzhen because they don't really push you. Even if they do, they don't scare you lah ah. Alot of stuff that can be bought with discounts and from that market, I learned my mum's ways of haggling and I gotta say, it's like one of the best lah ah. Pecaya a BND200+ cheapskate bag my mum buleh kurangkan jadi BND80+? Banggangku on the spot. My mum's method was 'Mua seposen' Style. HAHA. So seposen, so effective. I'm so going to practise and use it. Hehe.

 Again, the boat where Giulianna and Bill rode when they went there. And yes, it is the only boat left of that style lah ah. We saw that during the city's light show. Ok lah the show. I was so banggang where to look but none the less it's so pretty. I kinda wish we looked from the other side as in from Causeway Bay. Another misconception; my parents always thought the Stars Avenue is Causeway Bay when in fact Causeway Bay is on the other side of the waters.

 Day 5

Our last day was just going around the airport really since our flight was around 2. Hehe. So different from when I 1st went there. That time, the airport was not busy at all it was like KL airport at night time. Now going around the shops even makes me pening. So many people banartah sakit kepala. The shops lagi wow. Mmph. And oh! Muslims for your information, there is a Halal fastfood joint in the airport: Popeye's. It's the only halal place to eat in there (there's one outside and inside of the airport arrival halls) so yeah keep a heads up. 

Hehe that's it! My trip. I gotta say it WAS SO FUN! A happy trip I have to say Alhamdulillah and I wish I can go there again. Aight! I'm out! Toodles! 

You know what? Despite my happy posts on my trip -which was like, already 2 weeks ago- I actually feel really bad these past few days. I know why of course and though I'm not going to say it here but I think it'd be okay if I could just let my frustrations out here right?

Yes frustrations.

I'm just so upset, I'm not in any good mood and I just can't help but feel so..Blank about it.

Helpless lah rasanya..Sigh.

I wish these commitments I have that I'm passionate about is focused on other areas besides this. Atleast I can make money out of it.

Atleast I won't depend on it.

I'm so disappointed with myself.

But the worst part it? I actually don't have to even think about it banarnya. Banarnya I don't really have to take it seriously and they're right, "Jangan tah dipikirkan bah. Buat macam biasa saja."

They're right.

But I can't make it "macam biasa saja." Because if I do then the outcome will be the same and if balik-balik cematu, balik-balik tah tu that thing datang and it might get worst.

And in the end they'll be the ones to be blamed. It'll be a burden and it'll all be because of me.

I hate it when I know I'm a burden. Well, who doesn't right?

But I absolutely despise it.

But it also got me wondering: Am I not good enough? And if they think that way then should I leave? Because I think I deserve more than this.

Should I've held back atleast?

Is it too late to do it now?

I want to change. I really do.

Because I want to be colder. I want to atleast be worth it to not be implied as a burden. I want to be all the things they'll be scared of. I want them to be worried about me.

Maybe I should go away for a while.

Maybe I should.

2nd day was the Shenzhen trip for us. Woke up in the morning got ready and took the MTR to Lu Wo Shenzhen. It only took us around 20 minutes to reach Lu Wo and less than BND100 for 6 people! Here's how:

Also there is no need for changing to the next train and such so it was quite easy and pleasant for me. Then after that when you reach Lu Wo, you just get out of the train and follow the crowd as most of them will be crossing the border to get into China. And oh yeah, BRING YOUR PASSPORT! If I'm not mistaken for Malaysians you need visas in any parts of China (check it out just to be sure before you go). Brunei; no need. Hee. Okay so when you cross the border you need to fill out the arrival forms and departing forms aight? Just like going into Miri or KK. Sama. Difference is that you're not in your car.

I didn't take pictures alot while I was there really. Because I just felt wary that people would look at me and try to steal from me or something. Because that's just the kind of thing I feel when I was there. Yes, I'm not really a big fan of Shenzhen. They pull you into their shops, they are so memajal and I was so mengaleh to layan them that I'm just grateful that I didn't stay there overnight. But, I love their xhanel bags and shawls so I mainly went there for them. The place near the station is like Ladie's Market in Hong Kong pulang ah. You can haggle and such. But sini they REALLY try to rip you off -_- Malasku mau layan tarus. For those kinds of shopping it's actually cheaper to go and buy those stuff in Guanzhou from what I heard. I may be going there again btw so yeah I'll let you know when I do. Hehe.

It was a 5 days 4 nights trip and we arrived there around 1pm I think. I can't remember. Haha. But yeah we arrived and went straight to our hotel, Royal Plaza at Mongkok. Okay, first off as for the hotel; IT'S FREAKING AWESOME! They just renovated the place so due to those inconveniences we were upgraded to the business floor. Roomnya awesome yo! Seriously I was so sakai tahap gaban!

The best part about this place? It's connected to a shopping mall. A big one at that! Hahah..And the East Mongkok MTR Station! Bad thing is that it's still under renovation during our stay ani so I didn't get to try their sport facilities and such. Sigh.

So after we settled, we went out to eat. See, it's kinda known that muslim food are mostly available near Nathan Road at Tsim Tsa Shui since the mosque is there. From Mongkok on the other hand takes about 20 minutes MTR journey to reach that place. Jauh lai -_- Ganyakan makan lai! So yeahm we went to Tsim Tsa Shui using the MTR. And the awesome part of it? I'm incharge of guiding ourselves around the MTR. So proud yo :3 Jangan bebagai! Hehe..

So after our seriously early dinner, we went shopping around there. Sampai malam. Hahah. So many stores there nearby at walking distance so it was easy to go around. And I have to say that area has changed alot since the last time I went there. Dulu Chungking Mansion atu feels like, really dangerous and macam nada orang mau aga kalau buleh pasal berijap? But now, it lookes cleaner, safer and better stores there now so it's good lah ah.

Happy and tired faces after shopping. Hehe..After we were done there, we went back and went around to shop at the mall at our hotel. I gotta say that place (mall connected to our hotel at mongkok) ok lah ganya sadly it's under renovation as well so it was really hard to shop there and really enjoy it. But what I did notice there are their sport shoes/sneakers. Omg, kan I went up to the 3rd floor bah and I saw Nike's sport store. You know, right the official one with the official designs of black and wood concept? So yeah I went in and Omg they buy the shoes there like they're in the factory outlets or something. Tapi murah ah..For me I mean. Remember the shoe I posted? The one I bought at KL? Yeah that one. I bought that shoe for BND130 di KL. You know how much it cost there at HK right now with no sale? BND86! Gila jua tu indakah? -_- Sekali the basketball sneakers are no joke as well. Whenever I look at one it always cost around BND160 and above wah. Tapi kan sana that one sneaker I saw BND160 at KL is like BND110 udah di HK! Inda gilakah tu? -_- Gila! Sakit kepala! I think it was the white purple one..the Kobe low cut.

Hehe Okaylah, that's day 1. Till then!

Toodles,