So I was thinking about this all day:
How you can't seem to get what you want,
How you seem to can't catch a break,
and How you wish you'd just have a better life than you have now; be it in terms of money, relationships and work.
I mean, it's impossible for a person to never experience this. Even when you're a baby right? Like how you'd cry when you need milk but it's frustrating when no one understands you? Yeah, you know you still do.
In my own life, I've experienced those stuff where you just want to scream when it just doesn't go your way and seriously, who doesn't right? You get disappointed, you're unhappy and you just feel like you don't want to live anymore. But through those disappointments; you learn to control yourself, you learn to prepare for them and you learn to see the bright side to it. You learn to be better and the bigger you get, the tougher it is but with all that has happened; it made you stronger and that strength is what's making you to live on.
I asked myself; what strength has made me go on? So I thought, the hope that it gets better.
The hope that you know life is like a wheel where once you're up, you're bound to go down sometimes. But at the same time you know you're going to go up soon in no time.
Somehow I get to listen to one of Mufti Menk's taklim on the radio today and in this one he said that when you're having it hard then that means Allah loves you. He loves you so much that when you have lost focus on Him to the finer things in this world, He takes it away from you so that you can come back to Him and gain paradise hereafter.
Seriously how awesome do you feel when in times you are at lost and in hardship, you remember it's because Allah loves you? And that He wants you back? How special do you feel? And with that thought, isn't that enough to be optimistic and live on?
Straight up saying I still have alot to learn on how to control myself and be optimistic; in other words, to just be damn grateful. I still complain and am still unsatisfied with the things I have and I still let it all out to people when they too, have their own problems as well but manage to keep it in. So for that I am still ashamed of myself. I may complain that I don't have enough sport shoes while other people might having it hard to even get one. So why am I so ungrateful? Sigh.
I think when we say sabar, I think most of the time it should be pasrah. To me sabar is holding it in and try not to lash out while pasrah is holding it in and accepting the fact and not think of it after that. So when we pasrah instead, how much better would we feel after that? Makes me wonder. Ahah..
Well, sorry ah random post lagi but seriously living on makes you think. Hahah apakan saya ah..
Aight!
